Before, during or after pregnancy: when to choose the name of the child? - The360 Lifestyle

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  • Sunday, December 1, 2019

    Before, during or after pregnancy: when to choose the name of the child?

    Before, during or after pregnancy: when to choose the name of the child?

    It is these decisions that are not to be taken lightly. The choice of the first name of his child is part of it. Some have already defined it for a long time, when others peel guides and sites of all kinds until D-day. What is the best time to finally decide? The psychoanalyst and specialist names François Bonifaix gives us some keys. 


    Many parents agree, the search for the first name given to his child is difficult. But is there a good time to stop his choice? "Not so much," observes the psychoanalyst François Bonifaix. "It's about doing it when you're ready." As simple as that. Nevertheless, the path to "Emma", "Berenice" or "Malo" is not trivial. "The appetite for this or that name begins to be born from childhood, when one plays with the doll. We then tend to give so-called names of children or the order of the imagination, "says the specialist names. A step is again crossed during puberty. "Even if the desire for maternity or paternity is non-existent, there is a form of projection."

    It's when you get in a relationship that everything becomes more concrete. "At the corner of a conversation, we ask his partner:" And if we had a child, as you would call, you? " Casually, we test the other, we feel the ground. Because the choice of the first name is revealing, "analyzes François Bonifaix.

    A decision never final

    When the baby project is finally engaged, the timing depends on a couple to another. "Some need to choose the name even before pregnancy," notes the psychoanalyst. Is it so surprising? Not really. Naming allows the project to exist. "The timing of the choice will determine when the child really exists in your life." That's why many people prefer to wait until after the first trimester of pregnancy, during which miscarriages are common. "From there, future parents start to project themselves more, says the author of The Trauma of the name. As the fetus grows and takes shape in the womb, the need to name it appears. It makes it easier to understand and interact with."

    For their part, some prefer to wait to know the sex of the baby before starting to peel guides of all kinds and websites. In the meantime, whether it has been found or not, the name is never final. Do not panic, therefore, if the hesitation resurfaces. On the contrary. This uncertainty means that the choice is precise. The specialist shares some tips to help us decide: "When the fetus is able to hear (usually from the 24th week of pregnancy, Ed), we can offer names and see if he reacts or not. You can also simply slip small papers in a jar and draw lots. These are the means that work when one hesitates."

    Birth, a trigger

    Once the name is chosen, two camps oppose: those who announce it to their relatives and those who refuse it for fear of criticism. "The advantage with keeping the first name for yourself is that it avoids derogatory remarks and it prevents falling back into hesitation," said François Bonifaix.

    What about those who wait until the last moment to be fixed? According to a survey by L'Officiel des prénoms (Éditions First), 16% of parents, say they stopped on the first name of their child on the day of birth. For the psychoanalyst, this indecision is not trivial. "In reality, it shows that there is a problem of acceptance of the child who resolves at birth. That's when the click happens. " Only risk of a choice made in haste? The first name is misspelled when registering the civil status certificate. At your own risk, therefore.

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